Monday, April 01, 2013

Former Proponent of Livable, Walkable City Purchases Big Friggin’ Cadillac

This post was part of an April Fools Day joke.   

Cadillac Coupe de Ville 1972
Hopkins could not be happier about his gas guzzling vintage score.  Photo by Flickr user order_242

“For awhile, I liked walking,” says Jed Hopkins, of Maryland Avenue NE.  “But I noticed everybody does that around here.  And if it’s one thing I’m not, it’s a joiner. So I went out and got a really big gas guzzler that’s 18-19 feet long.  It’s hard to park.  My Johnny-come-lately neighbors with the backyard chickens and windmill powered ipads throw me some mean-ass looks.  And filling up my monster brings a grown man to his knees in pain.  But dude, the majesty of the ride, the sound system, the way I can lay out and take a nap in this baby is awesome!”


Ralph Nader said...

Shoulda got a Crown Vic. Loser.

Anonymouse said...

I'd drive the hell outta that thing. It would be the coolest ride in Trinidad. I'd even put horns on it.

I think that the only people who could get away with driving something like that is someone who has parking, doesn't depend on a car to get around and commute, and won't need to worry about mileage much.

poo poo said...

nice parking job.